I am sad to report that I did not have anything super funny to say after I came out of surgery the other day. Perhaps the only funny thing is that I told the nurse I was in pain and he asked me how I felt about morphine. I said "I feel awesome about morphine. Bring it." I wish I hadn't said that because then the itching started and I barfed. I guess you just can't win.
I have been really surprised that the recovery for this surgery has been a lot harder than other recoveries have been. Perhaps it is because I am older. Perhaps it is because the nature of the surgery is just different. I am in a tremendous amount of pain (due to the stent placed in my ureter) and even the most basic of functions (like urinating) have become a huge production. And to top off all of that, I broke out in a huge nasty rash on my face yesterday. We had to take another trip to the doctor late last night (our 3rd in 1 1/2 weeks) just so I could be told that I'm most likely allergic to penicillin and get a benadryl shot.
In addition to the physical pain, I've been having a lot of feelings of despair and loneliness. It's hard not to have my mom around, and others that I feel that I can depend upon are otherwise occupied with death or sickness of a relative. My house is messy, which frustrates me to no end, but I'm too embarassed to ask someone from the ward to come over and help because I would die if they saw the mess. Rob has been great, but he can't be here during the day. And just when I thought the cat had a touch of sympathy in her, I realized that she was only jumping up on the bed and rubbing up against me and purring because she didn't have any food.
Now that I'm finished complaining, I want to tell you that I do know that Heavenly Father is aware of me and my situation. Last night as I was writhing in pain after going to the bathroom, I asked Rob to give me a blessing. I immediately felt the pain diminish and a sense of peace overcame me. I am grateful for my husband and the priesthood which he holds. My life has been blessed many times over because of priesthood power and I am grateful that God has given worthy men the authority to act in His behalf.
During one of my lower moments, I got a text message from one of the last people I would expect to hear from asking if she could do anything to help. It is events like these that confirm for me that Heavenly Father sends us the things we need when we most need them.
I am still frustrated that I can't do some of the most basic things for myself right now, but I know that things could be worse. Things can always be worse.
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8 comments:
I wish I lived closer and then maybe I could help you out more! I'll certainly keep you in my prayers. I know how it is to not want to ask for help, but feel like you really need it. I too am grateful for heavenly father knowing my needs, and for a husband who can give blessings. I'm so glad you have that. Hang in there!
Jen,
I am so sorry that you don't have anyone nearby to help. Please know that if we lived closer, I would honestly come and clean your house tomorrow.
I hope that you are feeling better quickly :)
Hang in there Jen. It can be hard but will get better. Lots of people love you!
I'm sorry Jen. If I lived there I would come over and clean your house for you and help you out.
Not cool. I hope you can recover quickly.
And allergies to penicillin to boot?
Not fun.
I WILL make it by to see you! I think of YOU everyother thought. :)
Hi: I got here from the Forever Layman's blog. Hope you don't mind me leaving a comment.
I get the same symptoms to morphine: I am severely allergic to it--and all other Narcotic pain killers. I hope you are not allergic--it's kinda expensive to have the drug mixer to mix you up a special concoction to stop your pain.
I'm so sorry you had to go through all of that. I wish we'd been around to help. It was wonderful seeing you during our quick trip to Utah. You are wonderful and your smile always brightens my life.
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